


Friends in Strange Places

by Not_You



Category: Fantastic Four, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: AIs can be friends too, Demisexuality, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-29
Updated: 2013-04-29
Packaged: 2017-12-09 21:51:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/778370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Not_You/pseuds/Not_You
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For a very old kinkmeme prompt for Clint knowing other Marvel heroes from his years with SHIELD.  I hated the Fantastic Four movies and am not the comics' biggest fan, so I've rebuilt them for the movie in my head and I hope no one minds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

In a touching gesture of trust, Tony has given each Avenger enough security clearance to authorize people who aren't specifically supposed to stay out. Already he's had coffee with Heimdall and a late dinner with a hairy fireplug of a man named Logan whose aging is slow enough that he served with Steve and is still kicking, a cherished link to the past. Two days ago some mean-looking platinum blonde had shown up for Natasha, and Tony hadn't been sure if they had gone off together to fight or fuck. Jarvis was too much of a gentleman to tell him. Now it seems to be Clint's turn. It's kind of surreal, really, wandering out of the lab for a sandwich and finding a gorgeous blonde with a casserole dish and a 10,000 watt smile standing there. She's wearing some classy perfume he'll be able to identify in a minute, and has one of those perfect french manicures favored by politicians' wives.

"Hello! You must be Mr. Stark." There's a sweet mildness to her voice that Tony has almost never heard in real life, and he wonders if Steve will faint if he catches sight of this specimen of old-fashioned femininity. She's even wearing a dress, with a modest neckline and a full skirt and everything. She makes him feel half-naked and disgusting in his perfectly presentable ensemble of undershirt, jeans and bare feet.

"Tony, please. You want coffee?"

"As long as you're making some, that would be lovely."

Clint comes in, and grins. "Hey, Sue." She sets the dish down, fluttering over and kissing his cheek as he hugs her, the two of them looking incongruous together.

"I only have a minute, but I thought I'd come by and leave you that vegetarian lasagne of mine."

"Yeah, the one you won't give me the recipe for."

"I would, but my aunt swore me to secrecy."

Tony prowls over and lifts the lid. The dish looks promising, with definite cheese involvement and the scent of fresh tomatoes rather than canned. "Is this one of those good and good for you kinds of things?"

"Pretty much." She smiles. "You'll want to heat that at 350 for about forty minutes, uncovered unless it starts to dry out."

Tony ponders proposing to her, but then sees the little chip of diamond on her left hand flash, and the gold band above it. Clint preheats the oven since it's about time for lunch anyway. Or brunch, if you're Tony. Fifthmeal? He tries to remember if he's actually been asleep since the night before, and is delighted to find the coffee done, pouring two cups as Sue and Clint settle at the table. "Did you get something pretty with your winnings, or something useful?" He asks, glancing at Tony and clasping his hands imploringly.

Sue giggles as Tony sets their cups down and pours another for Clint, dropping it off on his way to get cream and sugar. "You know, I still haven't decided."

"Winnings?" He joins them and watches in mild horror as Clint makes sure to leave just a little coffee to go with his sugar.

"Oh, Sue's one of my poker buddies. Cleaned out last week."

She laughs. "I just don't know when Ben will learn to tell that I'm bluffing."

"Doesn't help that you're the only one who can tell what Reed's thinking."

"Reed?"

"My husband, Dr. Reed Richards."

"...Wait a minute."

Clint rolls his eyes. "Yes, that Richards."

"Oh my god, that makes you Sue Storm."

Clint groans. "Here comes the geek-out."

Sue laughs. "Oh, that's all right." It's all the encouragement Tony needs, and they talk shop until she checks her dainty little watch (the band matched to her shoes and her purse, Jesus fuck) and declares that she really must be off. She kisses Clint's cheek again and Tony's as well, and vanishes in a swish of skirts.

"...Okay," Tony says in the silence as Clint tucks the lasagne into the oven, "We have to introduce her to Steve. Maybe I'm a monster, but I just can't resist."

"I know, right? But it would be seriously cruel even if she wasn't married. I don't know if I've ever even heard her say that a guy who wasn't Reed was hot. Like, attractive or well-dressed maybe, but nothing... What's that word? Starts with a v?"

"Visceral?"

"Yeah, that."


	2. Chapter 2

Steve is very, very confused. He knows things are a lot different now, but he had honestly thought that Clint was with Natasha. Neither of them give much away, but they way they look at each other sometimes, and the easy way they share space and lean on each other for comfort reminds him of some of the secretly queer soldiers he's known. Really early on he had wondered if it was because they weren't married or wanted to be but weren't allowed to, but now he's pretty sure they just don't want to reveal any vulnerability whatsoever. And he can respect that. He's been there. But he had thought they really loved each other and now here's Natasha giving this other woman one hell of an un-sisterly kiss.

He almost feels like he should be proud of himself for managing to sneak up on her, but she's got to be pretty distracted. Even worrying about poor Clint this is probably the single sexiest thing he's ever seen, Natasha in her sleek black and whoever her friend is in gleaming silver. They're about the same size, with the same lithe and ferocious body. They've both got a little more ass than is fashionable these days, and that is absolutely wonderful. He and Natasha are apparently on the same wavelength because she gets both her dainty hands on that silver-clad ass and squeezes, and her friend makes this gorgeous little noise. Steve blushes and starts edging backward only to trip on a weight bench and go ass-over-teakettle on the mat.

"Sorry!" He squawks as they both round on him, and holds up empty hands in peace. "I didn't think anyone was going to be in here!" For a moment he thinks the woman in silver is just going to kill him where he lies with the little blade that has appeared in her hand like a magic trick. She's a platinum blonde with icy grey eyes and a mouth perfect enough to haunt his dreams, a little bruised from kissing Natasha, and she looks at him as if he's something stuck to the bottom of her boot.

"This is he, I take it?" She sounds scornful and bored, making the blade disappear again.

"Captain Steve Rogers," Natasha agrees, and offers Steve a hand up. He takes it, despite doing everything under his own power. "This is Silver Sablinova."

"Uh, pleased to meet you, ma'am." She doesn't deign to shake his hand and he wasn't really expecting her to.

"Captain America. How strange to see you."

"Yeah, I get that a lot. Look, does Clint know about..?"

"The sapphistry?" Silver prompts, mocking and gentle.

"...I thought that was when you used a lot of big words to float something stupid."

They both stare, and then start honest-to-god giggling at him and he blushes even worse than he is already. "You know, he is charming, in an idiot kind of way," Silver says at last, and Natasha rolls her eyes.

"Silver is the product of hundreds of generations of noble breeding, which is why she's so rude. And sapphistry means lesbianism, and Clint knows."

"...Oh. Okay."

"You think we need a man's permission, Rogers?"

"What? No!" It comes out as a bit of a squawk, because two of the chorus girls had been together and he had regularly had go around with them and pretend to be sweet on one or the other to keep them from being bothered. The assumption stings. "I just care about my teammates. If I found Clint with another woman I'd worry too."

Natasha smiles, just a little. "You're very sweet, Steve."

"...Uh, thanks." All his plans of actually working out are shot, and he's not sure what he says before he scurries away. And guiltily draws the image burned into his mind. About a dozen times. He's working on a few more when there's a soft knock at the door that makes him scurry to hide his sketchbook. "Yeah?"

"Mind if I come in?" Getting a negative response, Clint comes in and studies Steve, his hands in his pockets. "You okay?"

"You know, there were homosexuals before 1969."

Clint laughs. "Well, you know. You care about my mental health, I care about your mental health."

"I'm fine, just kind of confused. It's not really any of my business, so long as no one's feelings are hurt."

Clint chuckles, and pulls the chair over from Steve's desk, straddling it and resting his elbows on the back. "Sometimes asking questions helps with that."

Steve blushes. "Well, who is she? Is she Natasha's girl and you share time, or what?"

"Silver's a bitch, but she's a fantastic lay." Steve looks at him in mild horror. Clint rolls his eyes. "I'm not trying to be disrespectful, it's just the truth. Fine, let's just say that she's one mean-tempered lady, but smart and brave. Natasha likes that. All three of us go way back."

"I guess I see."

"To put it your way, Tasha is my girl but Silver is willing to screw both of us when she happens by and everyone is fine with that." He smiles. "I told them there were too many people staying here for them to fool around in the gym."


	3. Chapter 3

When something bad happens over the comms, it's always worse. The knowledge that they can't do anything, can't even be there and see the horror with their teammate, is like salt in the wound.

This time it's Clint's breathless voice in their ears, quick and quiet and wrathful. "This building was supposed to clear god fucking damn it why isn't it clear heads are going to roll for this shit--" They can hear his bolting feet and then another explosion. He's been there for too long already, and Fury has been growling about the worthless fucks who screwed up the perimeter whenever he has a moment.

"Hawk, get out of there!"

"Got a civilian, Cap." And then his voice shifts, soft and soothing over desperation. "Hang on, honey, just hang on, it'll be okay, just-- No!"

They can pick up the tiny, shrill scream of a child through the comms, and everyone's hearts sink even further. And then Clint is laughing. A little hysterically, but not the broken glass cackle they'd expect. "Lose something?" A new voice, one that sounds like a teenage boy.

"Fuck, I thought I had. Oh my god. She's the last one, could you take her down?" He clicks over to the general SHIELD frequency and alerts the agents guarding evacuated civilians that Spiderman is coming by with a kid and that Clint sent him and that if anyone does anything funny they're going to fucking regret it. "And you, sweetheart, remember: the roof is the worst place to be in case of aerial bombardment."

"'Es," the kid squeaks, and Tony cackles like a lunatic.

"Did you seriously just say that? Omigod, what do you mean you can't make a PSA? That shit is gold!"

"Shut up, Tony."

When the threat is finally contained and they stagger back to the tower, Clint's little pal comes too. He's lanky and light and really does kind of look and move like a spider, and is geeking out hardcore to be meeting Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, and Captain America. Clint finally tells him to shut his mouth before he catches more flies than he can eat. To be very sure, he plugs the hole with pizza. After all, Spiderman is really a growing spiderboy, and needs all the calories he can get. So do the rest of them, left hollow by effort and adrenaline, and it's a lot like their excursion for shawarma after the Chitauri invasion, just a pile of exhausted superheroes and greasy pizza boxes.

Clint groans when his phone rings, but answers it. "Barton." He pauses. "Oh, hey Sue. Nah, we're all fine. Recovering, refueling... Spiderman's here too, he helped out. ...Oh, that sucks. ...Hang on, lemme ask my sugardaddy." He turns to Tony, who is raising an amused eyebrow at him. "Daddy, can I host our poker game this weekend? Most of the Baxter Building is fucked, apparently."

"Of course you can, baby." He makes a paper airplane out of a hundred dollar bill and flies it to Clint. "Buy yourself something pretty."

"Awesome. Yeah, we're good. ...Destabilized? Again?" He groans, and rolls his eyes. "Whatever. ...Yeah, just pour him in a bucket and bring him over. ...Yeah, you too. 'Night." He hangs up, and Tony grins at him.

"It's still weird that you're poker buddies with the Fantastic Four."

"The who now?" Steve asks.

"The Who are actually another great band you have to listen to, but the Fantastic Four is the unwanted press name of a group that ran into a colossal scientific cockup and got irradiated."

"So, like me, but not," Bruce adds, carefully balancing his fifth slice.

"You can join us for poker, I don't think even Reed would mind you."

That Saturday, Reed is sulking. He would claim that he doesn't sulk, but he would be lying. Still unable to fully stabilize, he has no choice but to wear his work clothes, a dark blue puddle in the massive pail Ben is carrying. He lurks below the rim until they're safely onto the Avengers' floors, when he coalesces enough of his upper body to peek over.

Sue smiles down at him. "Good to see you again, darling."

"Relax, Stretch," Ben rumbles, shifting his grip on the pail.

"He's just pissed he might meet his science crushes as the Amazing Melted Man." Reed extends and swivels his neck 180 degrees to glare at Johnny, who smiles back, hands occupied with a tupperware cake transporter. "You know I'm right."

"...Perhaps," he admits, shrinking back to his own shape. He blushes almost imperceptibly when Sue strokes his hair once, letting her hand continue on and come to rest on his shoulder. Just that soft touch because any more is too much.

"We're here for a poker game, not a conference."

"I dunno, he could probably turn it into one."

"Thanks, Ben," he says dryly, and melts down again as they reach the right floor. It's not Clint's, but this elevator doesn't go higher than this entry floor, which is full of communal rooms and an unspeakable amount of security.

"Good evening, lady and gentlemen."

Ben looks around nervously, and Reed coalesces again. "A sophisticated AI, Ben."

"Precisely, sir. Now, if all of you will remain where you are for just a moment, I can scan you and send you up."

They oblige him, of course, and Reed doesn't stop talking to him the whole way to the secondary elevator, fascinated by his coding and every other aspect of his existence.

"Looks like my beloved brother-in-law has a new best friend," Johnny mutters, and Ben snorts in amusement. To both of them, the noise coming out of their leader's head might as well not be language. Even Sue gets her 'I need to look this up' look a few times.

"And now," JARVIS says as the doors slide shut and they start to move, "I have been ordered to 'let [Dr. Richards] the hell alone to play cards because he doesn't get out enough.' Good evening."

"...Killjoy," Reed mutters, and Sue laughs.

"We'll see if you can visit JARVIS, all right?"

"All right."

"Always knew you'd grow up to be a wonderful mother, Sue."

"Oh, Johnny."

"Well, all snark aside, I do think you'd be good at it. She ever tell you about her toy cars, Reed?"

"That she tucked them into a doll bed and read them stories? Yes."

The doors open on Clint's floor, and all of them look around curiously, because it's the first time they've ever seen a place that could really be called Clint's. Usually they're in the field or their own home, with a few visits to his impersonal quarters at SHIELD. Now they're walking into a comfortable living room with just the kind of cradling couch Clint favors. There's a kitchen and a sleeping loft visible beyond, and the scent of tuna casserole wafting out to them.

"Yo, Hawk!"

"Hey, guys!" He looks up as they come into the kitchen, shutting the oven door. "So, is Reed in love with JARVIS yet?"


	4. Chapter 4

"Hi!" It's a sweet, chipper female voice, and Tony groans. He is not awake enough for this shit.

"The fuck?" He squints in the general direction of one of the cameras through the steam from his coffee.

"Me and JARVIS are friends!"

"What. No. Goddammit. What the fuck are you?"

"My name is Flip! I'm an AI!" And she just sounds so damned excited about that. Tony pinches the bridge of his nose.

"Yes, but why are you here? I didn't make you. Did I make you? JARVIS, you're supposed to tell me when I black out."

"My apologies, sir. Flip had commandeered my speakers, like a silly girl." JARVIS has never sounded this indulgent in his life, and Tony can't handle it.

"JARVIS, tell me where the fuck she came from! For all we know she's just a candy-coated wad of malware!"

"Am not!"

"Flip, let me talk to Mr. Stark, please." He still sounds fond, and Tony groans. "Dr. Richards created her, sir. He became inebriated and borrowed Agent Barton's computer for some time before he left."

"...You're telling me that Mr. fucking Fantastic got wasted and created another sapient AI? For fucking fun? On Clint's setup?"

"He is extremely gifted, sir."

"I'm extremely gifted. This shit is ridiculous!"

Clint isn't awake enough for this shit either. "Reed made what?"

"Hi!" Flip chirps.

Tony shudders. "That. You have to make him come get her, Clint."

"All right, all right." Clint shakes his head, going to get his phone. "I swear to god, can't leave that man alone with anything. Hey, Sue? Yeah, you remember when Reed borrowed my laptop? ...Yeah, he let her out. Oh, you told him not to? Well, that's some points with Tony, anyway. ...Yeah, he wants you to come get her."

So Reed does have to meet his science crushes as the Amazing Melted Man. Ben comes clumping in, and grins down at Bruce and Tony. "Mornin'. Sorry Stretch left his little pet."

"Is he…" Bruce blinks at the bucket.

"Yeah, we're still working on gettin' him solid again. C'mon, Reed, head up."

A head and hands appear over the rim of the bucket. The head has shy blue eyes and a lot of premature grey at the temples. Bruce smiles at him. "Good to see you again."

After they get Flip over to the Baxter Building where she damn well belongs, they get to work on solidifying Reed. Or rather, Tony asks if it would be totally weird if he dipped his fingers in him, then muses that even asking is probably sexual harassment, while Bruce shrugs helplessly, mostly past being embarrassed by any insane thing Tony does. Reed just studies Tony for a moment, then shifts and slides like a whirlpool. "Try it now. The top layer is nothing but arms and legs."

"Awesome." Tony peers into the bucket, and dips his fingertips into the liquid. "Oh, wow. What happens if I do this?" He cups some in his palm, and it flows easily but doesn't detach from the main mass, flowing smoothly when Tony pours it back where he found it. "…That is so fucking cool."

Getting Flip onto the drive he has brought with him is pretty simple, so most of their time together is taken up by questions such as, "No, seriously. How do you breathe?" and "How much do you remember from your time as the Hulk?" Reed is fascinated by the arc reactor and even forgets to be embarrassed at being liquid, imperiously directing Ben as to when and where to move his bucket. Ben just chuckles quietly and does as he's told, talking with Clint when he drops by, the two of them comparing notes on how to survive sustained contact with eggheads.

"Transfer complete, sir," JARVIS says at last, sounding a little forlorn.

"On that subject, how in the hell did you do this with Clint's laptop?"

"…I don't remember too clearly," he murmurs, with an embarrassed glance to one side, "but she wasn't nearly this big in the beginning. I essentially left her with instructions on how to grow and released her into the wild."

There's a moment of silence, and then a flurry of questions that make Clint turn to Ben and ask how he feels about ordering some food, since they're clearly going to be here a while.


End file.
